Here goes a weird blog entry.

I think I have posted here that I am a recovering Disney addict. I had the fancy dancy annual pass that let me in whenever, I was one of those annual passholder butt holes (I was going to use another name/word, but let me keep this PG) that would complain about the park being too crowded in the middle of July and darn those tourists! I would go to Disneyland after work and lesson plan at the Golden Horseshoe instead of at my apartment, and I went something like 167 times in one year, I kid not. Then life happened... People changed me. I changed. I have posted in my blog and around Micechat that my co-op closed, I lost friends because when the economy dived and I had to close my co-op, and move back home... apparently that didn't work. I went through a tough five or so years moving back home, going back to school, trying to figure out what I wanted to do with the rest of my life, and going to Disneyland 167 times in one year didn't really work towards that. I had to change my life from living in my CRAPPY apartment that I shared with 4 people (including sharing a bedroom with 1 person) and living the Orange County lifestyle on $667 a month (so imagine credit cards and intentionally overdrawing my account) to impress people... 5 years later I am in Washington, I am almost done with my LPN (had the first day of the last quarter today), working NOCs at a hospital, aspiring to be an ER/trauma RN, and turning 31 years old with an okay credit score. I had booked a cruise to the Western Caribbean with my dad after I graduated and that's nearly paid off, a Disney cruise.

Two days ago I was watching "Property Virgins" and had the "Oh God! Turning 31! I still live at home!" overwhelming feeling. Never a good thing. Also never drink wine and stay up ALL DAY if you're tired, watching "Property Virgins," and feeling sorry for yourself--- life lesson kids. I found a house and dismissed it. Then on my 31st birthday at 0400 I looked again and thought about it. I figured out I could afford it. Long story short I told my mom I may buy a house and cancel my Disney cruise and use that as a down payment. Checked the house out. Perfect. It was/is my ideal house. Then came the fretting. I could buy a house, it was great. 2 bed/1 bath, new kitchen, weird stuff here and there, water view, quarter mile from the beach, a fixer upper, but I could still buy it. I did the math, if I had a roommate I could buy it... I ate dinner with my mom, then tried to go to bed. I couldn't sleep. Which sucks because I work NOCs and yeah not sleeping is bad. I got maybe 3 hours of sleep before class. I had a friend look at it too.

The answer came to me in the shower:
I could buy this house, be house poor, live on ramen, not do the repairs because I couldn't afford them, have a roommate in an 808 square foot house, not finish my RN because I had a mortgage... Or wait until I finished my degree. I figure I will have time to buy a house. I will be in a better position later on. Plus then I wouldn't have to be in such a crappy position to buy. I'd have money to make repairs. Love the house. This is my dream house, but there will be other houses. Also it wasn't in the best location. There was no parking and a weird crappy outhouse that I think someone was using... Ewwww...

Still I was within a hair of cashing out my cruise and buying a house today.