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Who would be the worst narrator for the "new" SSE?

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  • Who would be the worst narrator for the "new" SSE?

    With people suggesting folks like James Earl Jones or Jeremy Irons again, I started thinking about bad choices

    Several comedians come to mind.
    Gilbert Godfrey
    Steven Wright
    Norm McDonald (in his full-on monotone mode)
    Lewis Black (in full-rant mode)
    Chris Rock (with full explatives)

    I'm sure you guys can think of WAY worse choices than I. So, who would be the worst narrator?

  • #2
    Re: Who would be the worst narrator for the "new" SSE?

    Believe me when I tell you, this is NOT a political statement:

    George W. Bush

    His command of the English language is, well, remarkable.
    That was wonderful! Bravo! I loved that! Ah, that was great! Well, it was pretty good. Well, it wasn't bad. Uh, there were parts of it that weren't very good though. It could have been a lot better. I didn't really like it. It was pretty terrible. It was bad. It was awful! It was terrible! Take 'em away! Boo! Boo!

    sigpic

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    • #3
      Re: Who would be the worst narrator for the "new" SSE?

      Agreed. We'd be hearing "She's a West Texas girl like me" and that we'd need to "make the pie higher"

      Who else?

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      • #4
        Re: Who would be the worst narrator for the "new" SSE?

        Heres my picks for the WORST narrators:

        Bjork
        Michael Jackson
        James Brown Jr.
        Ben Stein

        However, I wouldnt mind having the narration done by Gary Busey or even Sebastian Bach
        sigpic Blast Off Into Adventure!!


        Originally posted by TheRockr
        Space Junk once taught Peter Pan how to do Mick Jagger's famous strut.

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        • #5
          Re: Who would be the worst narrator for the "new" SSE?

          ooh...Bjork! She could do the soundrack too!

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          • #6
            Re: Who would be the worst narrator for the "new" SSE?

            We need the California Governor.. Arnold Schwarzenegger.

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            • #7
              Re: Who would be the worst narrator for the "new" SSE?

              The worst would be Donald Duck and Goofy

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              • #8
                Re: Who would be the worst narrator for the "new" SSE?

                Originally posted by Peabody View Post
                Steven Wright
                Norm McDonald (in his full-on monotone mode)
                Lewis Black (in full-rant mode)
                Chris Rock (with full explatives)
                I love these guys! I'd probably make more trips to Orlando just to hear them narrate the attraction. :lol:
                "Dope smoking insects and reckless driving always work." -- Cousin Orville

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                • #9
                  Re: Who would be the worst narrator for the "new" SSE?

                  Rosie and her annoying voice. It's bad enoug that she's already at DCA.

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                  • #10
                    Re: Who would be the worst narrator for the "new" SSE?

                    I'm sorry, I don't think I could take Mickey Mouse as the narrator for such an attraction. He'd be the worst.

                    I've heard Mickey narrating Spaceship Earth before... at least with the current version, it's not pretty.

                    I think we need someone who can stand the test of time. Someone with an excellent reputation and personality. Someone like... Dr. Nigel Channing. j/k
                    -Dr. Nigel Channing
                    "We don't know anything... that can't be imagined."

                    "Keep Moving Forward"

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                    • #11
                      Re: Who would be the worst narrator for the "new" SSE?

                      Ooooh yeah do Donald and Ludvig Von Drake and then add Donald one by one to every attraction in epcot and have Donald around the world and then replace the wand with a giant sailor cap

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                      • #12
                        Re: Who would be the worst narrator for the "new" SSE?

                        Fran Drescher
                        Emo (the comedian; the guy who gets his finger cut off in UHF)
                        Vin Diesel (in tough guy monotone)
                        Steven Seagal (ditto)
                        Macy Gray
                        Tom Waits
                        Keith Richards (what did he say?)
                        Don Imus (hehe)
                        Christopher Walken
                        a Jimmy Stewart impersonator
                        Snoop Dogg
                        50 cent (again, what did he say?)
                        Carrot Top
                        And worst of all, Joan Rivers
                        Forget 'Great Moments With Mr. Lincoln,' Samantha Brown is Disney's most sophisticated animatronic.
                        ________________________________________
                        Disney/theme park Park Trips:
                        Disneyland Anaheim: 1983, 1987, 1994, 2002, 2007, 2011, 2012
                        Walt Disney World: 1997, 2007, 2010
                        Tokyo Disneyland: 2009, 2012
                        Disneyland Paris: 2010
                        Hong Kong Disneyland: 2012
                        Universal Orlando: 2007, 2010 (twice!)
                        Efteling:2011
                        Lotte World: 2012

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                        • #13
                          Re: Who would be the worst narrator for the "new" SSE?

                          Iago

                          Spaceship Earth "Under New Management"
                          The Musical!


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                          • #14
                            Re: Who would be the worst narrator for the "new" SSE?

                            Seth McFarlane in his Peter Griffen voice. No wait, this is the worst possible narrator. Peter Griffen would rock.

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                            • #15
                              Re: Who would be the worst narrator for the "new" SSE?

                              I would be the worst narrator.

                              "Ok kids! here we go.. Up the golf ball's left leg! Don't look at those stupid TV monitors... the lawyers made them do it... now on with this show...

                              Oh! Cavemen... and they know how to paint and do hand signals.. See? Geico was right... but who cares about them and the boring history lesson to be presented...

                              Oh! Look up, those spot lights are way over exposed and need to be covered..

                              OMG! there water on the floor between those two sets... maybe the steam machine in the Printing scene is leaking again.. Oh well, I am sure it will be turned off soon to avoid mechanical expenses in fixing it..

                              Here we are near the top in a disco light tunnel with no entertainment value whatsoever.. so let's talk about the past... Remember when the very same vehicles you are sitting on used to move sideways and face the scene the narration introduced to you? Now you just sit stationary moving forward 100% of the time..except when a wheelchair needs to be loaded. Oh I love the good old days..

                              "oh the end is near... hold on as it will be a steep decent. And for the love of God, keep your arms inside the vehicle and do not touch anything, or else, you'd be electrocuted by all those fiber optic wires that look pretty but do not tell anything about the story we just saw, unless you want to give them meaning by thinking you are inside a computer's hard drive, being communicated to some Disney board on the internet!

                              And that's the way it is kids... Have fun and thanks for visiting Spaceship Earth!""

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