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  • Dances With Venison

    To day is not my day with deer.

    Honestly.

    I live in Monterey County. My partner works at a marine station here near the aquarium. There is a meadow there that a few deer graze. Next to the meadow is a bike path and walking area.

    So, I'm walking my dog in this meadow and three deer come out of the bushes and start stalking us. They start doing the scrape the ground thing and the punch the floor thing with their hooves. So, yeah not docile like the cartoons, so I start to run Frodo, my dog, back to the car to get him away from the attacking deer. But while I did this, they're pretty much making ground towards us. So I stop, stamp my feet and throw rocks in their direction to scare them away. We're talking small, small rocks. Nothing lethal. The deer walk away, not too scared. I, on the other hand, was pretty shaken. These are huge animals.

    Anyway, as I'm going to the car I hear a voice, "Excuse me. Excuse me!" I turn. An old lady on the walking trail with three poodles on leash stands there shaking her fist at me.
    "Yes?" I ask winded. "Did you see that?! Oh my gosh."
    "I saw it. Were you throwing rocks at those deer?"
    "Heck yes."
    "How would you feel if they threw rocks at you. Those poor deer."
    "Lady, did you see them come at us?" I asked surprised.
    "No. All I saw was some idiot throwing rocks at defenseless deer." She said. Her voice was raspy and shaky. She was truly mad. At me.
    "Defenseless? Bring those poodles down here and see what happens."
    "I should call the police on you." She said.
    I caught my breath and just shook my head. I tried to think of something witty to say, but I came up blank.
    "Go ahead and call them." I said.
    "I will."
    "And keep walking, I'm tired of this conversation." I said. (What kind of response was that?!)
    Anyway, the police never came, some old lady is pissed with me and I was almost killed by Bambi and friends.

    It's funny after the fact...

    AND...

    I go to Circuit City to buy 'Bambi'. I mean, it is a Disney masterpiece. So I discretely (I mean, come on... it is a movie about a deer, skunk and rabbit... all with eyelashes...not very butch...) go to the checkout counter. The kid behind the register broadcasts, "HEY! When you buy 'BAMBI' you get to take home a free box of MILKDUDS!"
    I closed my eyes mortified. There was another idiot at a register next to him laughing... I already felt like I was buying tampons for the wife (you know like 'Mr. Mom') and this wasn't helping.
    "Thanks." I said. "I don't want the candy."
    "You have to, it's a package deal. Here grab one and I'll scan it."
    I do so. He hands me my bag.
    I grab my stuff and go to the guy that checks you out at the door. He looks at my receipt. I know this guy, he's a jokester. That's why they put him at the door. I saw it coming...
    "BAMBI?!" He says loudly.
    "Yes. 'Bambi'." I said. "You had to announce it."
    "Lots of guys are buying 'Bambi' today. What's up with that?" He asked laughing. "Oh, well. Whatever floats your boat."
    So, I overplay my hand and say in an obviously false way, "Uh yeah. It's for the kids."
    "Riiiiight." He says.
    I grab my bag and walk out.
    "Now you have something to talk to your shrink about." He said.
    "Wise ." I said so he could hear it.



    Not my day with the deer...

  • #2
    Teehee!

    Those deer sound pretty scary - I didn't realise they could be so aggressive!

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    • #3
      Great story GC!!! :lol: I would run like heck if 3 deer were trying to attack me.

      Didn't you see the Circuit city ad? Free candy when you buy Bambi. How much was it there?


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      • #4
        Originally posted by UvaGirl
        Teehee!

        Those deer sound pretty scary - I didn't realise they could be so aggressive!
        Me neither. I mean, I've seen that video where the hunter sprays himself with stuff that smells like a deer and he was brutally attacked, but I figured that was due to his smell.

        Apparently, deer and dogs don't mix.

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        • #5
          Originally posted by Malibu Minion
          Didn't you see the Circuit city ad? Free candy when you buy Bambi. How much was it there?
          $17.99

          I keep closing my eyes and seeing acne boy shoving a box of candy in my face. "MILK DUDS, dude!"

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          • #6
            LMAO... but what about trhe poor defenceless deer who have survived for soo long on their own killing creatures and fighting with dogs.... You just had to use their mortal enemy.. the small pebel.... HAHA!!!!

            Great story...

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            • #7
              OMG I am ROLLING!!!

              I would've peed my pants over the impending deer attack and then probably berated the old hag who was going to call the police, then promptly get in the car and tm disguy so I could remember it 100% to post it............HEY wait a minute............ :devil:


              How much you wanna be you'll be getting Bambi gift's this year? :lol:
              Last edited by dsnylndmom; 03-01-2005, 06:39 PM. Reason: can't spell for anything



              Delta Mu Chi Alpha ΔΜΧΑ

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              • #8
                I've never been afraid of buying anything Disney. Bambi is a gangster! Flower is a thug!

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                • #9
                  I woulda kicked that ladys @$$...
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                  • #10
                    Originally posted by Soulquarian
                    I've never been afraid of buying anything Disney. Bambi is a gangster! Flower is a thug!

                    Thumper is a pimp.

                    They are Bambi's posse, but it's Gansta'



                    Delta Mu Chi Alpha ΔΜΧΑ

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                    • #11
                      Originally posted by dsnylndmom
                      Thumper is a pimp.

                      They are Bambi's posse, but it's Gansta'
                      Which one is Lil Jon? And where is his Pimp Cup?

                      What an incredible story GC. The first thing I thought of when I started reading the story was poor Frodo and his short Corgi legs. You were a very brave dad. You protected your son very well.

                      The next time you go to Best Buy, you should hand the doorman a bill from your shrink. (Not a real one, just a fake one.)
                      Anything listed on the park maps as an attraction is fair game for inclusion in the Rally.
                      I cannot confirm nor deny the inclusion of any attraction in the Rally.



                      May the Gumballs Be with You...Always.

                      NO GOATS!

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                      • #12
                        OMG - What a story. I've heard my dad tell stories about the 1,000 lb fish that attacked his boat and tried to drag him to a watery grave, but never a deer story before.
                        :lol:

                        Throwing boulders at bambi. Deer oh deer, what's a boy to do?

                        Seriously, it would have scared the heck out of me too.
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                        • #13
                          deer are nasty creatures. Very dangerous.

                          and tasty, too!
                          "Conservatives are not necessarily stupid, but most stupid people are conservative." - John Stuart Mill
                          -
                          "We cannot defend freedom abroad by deserting it at home." - Edward R. Murrow
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                          "It's far easier to fight for your principles than it is to live up to them." - Adelai Stephenson
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                          Reason for the Season? Tilt of the planet's axis. Oh, you meant the holiday season? That's easy - Feast of Saturnalia. Disagree? That's nice.

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                          • #14
                            My brother was chased by a goose while taking pictures at Stanley Park in Vancouver, BC. He was terrified. In order to escape the wrath of the goose, my brother had to cross the street. This was during the first month or two of him living in Canada. I guess they don't call it Wildlife for nothing.
                            Anything listed on the park maps as an attraction is fair game for inclusion in the Rally.
                            I cannot confirm nor deny the inclusion of any attraction in the Rally.



                            May the Gumballs Be with You...Always.

                            NO GOATS!

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                            • #15
                              :lol:
                              Originally posted by dsnylndmom
                              Thumper is a pimp.

                              They are Bambi's posse, but it's Gansta'
                              :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
                              iM GONNA BUSTA HOOF ON YA!
                              1st Amendment-Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.

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                              • #16
                                Great story, although the old woman bit ticked me off. :lol: Have you ever been threatened by a squirrel before though?! Man, they are lethal, what they won't do to get a peanut butter sandwich.

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                                • #17
                                  Where's your shotgun when you need it?
                                  Marge: Barnacle Bill's Home Pregnancy Test? Homer, shouldn't we have gone with a better-known brand?
                                  Homer: But Marge, this one came with a corn-cob pipe!
                                  Marge: [reading from the test box] "Ahoy, Maties! If the water turns blue, a baby for you! If purple ye see, no baby thar be!"
                                  Homer: So, which is it? Blue or purple?
                                  Marge: Pink.
                                  Homer: D'oh!
                                  Marge: "If ye test should fail, to a doctor set sail!"

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                                  • #18
                                    Frodo is a corgi? I love corgis! I have two: Ricky and Lucy. There both Welsh tri-colored corgis. Corgis rock!
                                    Anyone up for a Colorado Micechatters meet-up?
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                                    • #19
                                      I see a deer, or more, and I don't think DANGER, I think LUNCH!

                                      MMMmmmmm.....venison!
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                                      • #20
                                        Originally posted by IndyJn511
                                        Frodo is a corgi? I love corgis! I have two: Ricky and Lucy. There both Welsh tri-colored corgis. Corgis rock!
                                        Frodo is a red Pembroke Welsh Corgi. There were some tri-colors in his litter, but he and 2 brothers turned out red.
                                        Corgies don't know that they are smallish dogs, though. Therefore, when he sees something to herd (like the deer) he's thinking 'I'm a big dog! Attack to herd.' in his head. No fear.

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