Traveling with the boy-

[Nephythys]

Men confuse me- this is not news to most people who know me.

So- to set up the scenario: I won a trip to Vegas. Set up a plan to go with a friend of mine. Friend got great new job and can't make it- then it turns out someone else I know was planning on going that weekend anyway. So I invite him-

Thing is- we are also...dating. I guess. Still figuring all that out to be honest. Anyway- we'll be sharing the plane, hotel room and lots of time together.

So I get this great idea- I am going to be so close to Disneyland, why not drive out? He's never been, so it's a fabulous opportunity for me to get out there and share it with someone who has never seen DL. Plus yeah, I like him, so it's a pleasure for me to do.

He said he would LOVE to go and he is looking forward to going- and I can tell he is being honest about it- but he suddenly seems to think I am sharing some big part of myself by taking him. He said it would be like him talking me into going to his favorite place in the world (which is in NY). Not exactly the same, but close. He doesn't seem to think this is a BAD thing, but I am just baffled.

We'll be traveling together, staying in the same room, spending 4 days together- that's a long date. We talk all the time- email, chat, phone....hours of conversation. We get along shockingly well, are frighteningly compatible and share many many things in common. No, we have not known each other for years- but sometimes it feels like it has been a long time. Why would this be a big deal? Even if it is a good thing, why would he see it that way?

I see it as a great chance to go to Disneyland and if I can share it with someone I like who has never been there- so I can see DL through new eyes- so much the better.

What am I missing here?

[Alan]

Seems like what you are missing is that this is going to mean more to him than you. sounds like he is infatuated. I wouldn't be surprised that by the time your trip is over, he has not mentioned marriage in some way. It will be an interesting experience but be prepared for anthing to happen.

[Nephythys]

Marriage LOL- I hope not. That would be a bit fast.

Sounds like HE is infatuated? Oh....if only I could count on that to be true.

That's why I don't get it- when it came to Vegas he was going with or without me. But once I added taking him to Disneyland, suddenly that meant something more.

[Demigod]

I think...

A. You shouldn't worry about it.

B. Enjoy!

[Disneyphile]

Marriage LOL- I hope not. That would be a bit fast.

Well, you ARE going to Vegas.

Just to let you know, yes - they really do have a Drive-Thru Chapel or you can get married by "Elvis".

Just watch how much you drink....... :devil:

Ah, the scenario:

Girl meets boy. Girl drags boy to Vegas. Girl keeps saying "We're only friends!" Boy buys girl a few drinks. Boy confesses love. Boy and Girl get married by Elvis and drive off for a honeymoon at Disneyland with a "non-romantic" lunch at the most romantic restaurant at the park.

[Nephythys]

gah- remind me to never never let him near this forum. You better behave that day babe! LOL :lol: :lol:

[desertdweller]

You never truly know a person until you've traveled with them.

[sir clinksalot]

^ So very true.

The first time my wife (then my girlfriend) traveled together was a disaster. It had nothing to do with us, but with my family who we were also traveling with. The first and ONLY time I ever wanted to leave Disneyland. It was THAT bad.

Of course, we stayed together, have taken MANY trips since and they have all been great.

I think what the guy is thinking is that this is that "next level" so many people dread. Meaning you are sharing something so special with him and it's kind of freaky for a guy. Especially if he isn't a Disney person.

Just go, have fun and let the pieces fall where they may.

[Nephythys]

wow- love this insight.

He knows things about Disney even I do not- yet it is all anecdotal knowledge, no real life experience. He seems genuinely interested, and in fact said that he is looking forward to it because he knows it is rare to get to feel like a kid and experience this kind of magic. For that he is already thanking me-

Next level- LOL- it's so funny because I so do not see it that way.

[LSPoorEeyorick]

I vote that you try not to overthink it too much... to enjoy it. If he is looking forward to going, then it doesn't matter if he thinks it's a big step. He still wants to take it. And you don't partcularly think it's a big step, but you are twitterpated, so this all should not be too much of a problem. Hurrah for happy trips, though.

[Jennidisneyfer]

Yep yep. Totally overthinking it. Just go w/ the flow, have fun, see what happens; all those other cliches.

[Gwyren]

You never truly know a person until you've traveled with them.

I agree with that.

[Disneyphile]

You never truly know a person until you've traveled with them.

Totally.

My honey and I did a cross-country drive in a U-Haul last year (started May 5th!), when he was moving out here to me. We made pitstops in various places, including Marceline, MO. And 5 days later, we pulled into home, still laughing and having a good time. That's how we knew our relationship would last. We never once had a bad time on that trip.

[Nephythys]

yeah- I know. I tend to overanalyze things. We kind of have this nebulous thing going on- that feels like a relationship but has not been defined as such. I don't do well with ambiguity for too long before I go a little nuts.

Then he seems to make a bigger deal of this- he said he did not expect this yet- but to me, it's Disneyland. I want to share it- no matter our future.

*sigh* and DP doesn't even mention that her cross country trip with the hobbit wizard boy was when she met me!

[Nephythys]

Travel update-
The good- He loved Disneyland. His reactions were fabulous and I was totally thrilled by it all.
The bad- I pushed the day long, and he wanted to go, but never said anything. He got a little bitter about it, but damn it, he could have said something and we would have left. He did take some responsibility for that-
The ugly- we missed our flight back!!! Due to massive miscommunications, a wrong turn and bad flight info- we had to DRIVE back from Vegas to Denver. We barely spoke to each other on the way back and both of us are insanely crabby and tense.

Status of relationship: unknown- hopefully intact.

[Cuzco-topia]

Yikes. Good luck.

[ah schucks]

Neph,
Please report back on this. My experiance dating recently and watching my sister and her boyfriend leads me to believe that the first trip is a milestone. She just went to Hawaii with a guy she has known 6 weeks and I sort of think it will push her into something special. On the other hand she went to Costa Rica last February and it ruined her relationship of 6 months.
I have had two dates at Disneyland...one with a disney fan and we fell in love, the other with a non-Disney fan and nothing came of it. I think...Disneyland will be a welcome reprise from the adult fun of Vegas. It will provide levity and 6 hours of driving for you to talk or explore each other's silence. Once there, its hard to imagine anyone not enjoying themselves in the presense of a real Disney fan at Disneyland. Best of luck-Tom

[NeverNeverland]

The drive from Vegas to Denver is rough even when you're on reat terms with the person you're driving with... I hope that everything ends up all right for you two!!

[Snacks]

HMmmmmmmmmmm..........

Sex will fix it........... thats my final thought

[Nephythys]

LOL- funny.

Well I tell you this- the trip was fantastic, or so I thought, right up to all the things that led to us missing the flight. There is no way to blame one or the other of us for the entire mess, it was fairly spread around. So for me, this is not the doom, but if it is for him? If he were to choose to be that unhappy with what happened that he no longer wanted to see me- then what can I do?

I am hoping that we were just both exhausted and worn out- and that things will be fine from here on out.