Good Puns/Bad Puns

[TinkPink]

These friars were behind on their belfry payments, so they opened up a small florist shop to raise funds. Since everyone liked to buy flowers from the men of God, a rival florist across town thought the competition was unfair. He asked the good fathers to close down, but they would not. He went back and begged the friars to close. They ignored him. So, the rival florist hired Hugh MacTaggart, the roughest thug in town, to persuade them to close. Hugh beat up the friars and trashed their store, saying he'd be back if they didn't close up shop. Terrified, they did so, thereby proving that only Hugh can prevent florist friars.


There was the person who sent ten different puns to his friends, with the hope that at least one of the puns would make them smile. No pun in ten did???? Come on!!

[TinkPink]

Here's another one:

A woman has twins and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named Ahmal. The other goes to a family in Spain; they name him Juan. Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his birth mother. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wishes she also had a picture of Ahmal. Her husband responds, They're twins! If you've seen Juan, you've seen Ahmal.

[grvtydefy]

Ok, I have one. It's REALLY bad- so be warned...

So this is about Gandhi. As we know, Gandhi was a very mystical man. He didn't wear shoes- he walked barefooted, which made the bottom of his feet really tough. Also, because he didn't eat too much, he was very fragile. His special diet also gave him a bit of a bad breath problem. So, one could say that he was a Super-calloused-fragile-mystic-hexed-with-Halitosis!

I told you it was bad...

[Villains Fan]

Just got this silly one the other day....




In today's Vatican news: Cardinal Sicola has been eliminated as a
candidate to be the next pope.


As a result, there will be no Pope Sicola.

[Tom Chaney]

Each evening, the good doctor would return to his home where his faithful butler, Dick, would prepare for him a cocktail. While most of the good doctor's peers prefered a Martini with an olive, the good doctor preferred a dacquiri with an almond. One evening, Dick was horrified to find that he was all out of almonds! In a panic, he improvised by mixing the good doctor's dacquiri with a hickory nut instead. Sensing something amiss with his first sip, the good doctor inquired, "Is this an almond dacquiri, Dick?" Caught in his attempted deception, Dick could only reply, "No....it's a Hickory Dacquiri, Doc!"